Substitute Teaching- Day One!

Friday was my first day as a substitute teacher, and i have to say that it went pretty well! Things were not perfect by any means, and I surely have some pros and cons about the whole experience, BUT i survived and got some good stories out of it! I subbed for a science teacher at the middle school who teaches 6th and 7th graders, and as a substitute i let them ask me some questions so they could learn a little about me...i love the things they came up with! Here's my list of

THINGS EVERY MIDDLE SCHOOLER WANTS TO KNOW

Are you related to the Olsen twins?

Are you married?

Are you seeing someone?

Is your boyfriend blonde?

Are you Mexican?

Do you have any kids?

Do you like kids?

What's the most exciting thing you've EVER done?

What's your phone number?

What's your first name? (I told them it was Ms.)

Are we friends?

Do you like me?

Do you like like me?

Basically, i left at the end of the day with a 100+ kids thinking i was the older sister to Mary-kate and Ashley, my parents were very unoriginal when they named me, and with 15 twelve year old boys with crushes on me! I'd say all in all, it was a good day!

surveys!! :)

some of you might not know this about me, but i really like taking surveys! i don't know why, it's a weird thing to like, maybe it's the psychologist in me coming out; i used to do it all the time but it's been quite some time! well it's time for another survey!!

There are two things that I need some info on:

- how often do you carry a purse with you when you go out???

less than 25%

25% to 50%

50% to 75%

more than 75%

- (this is more for my own curiosity) when was the last time that you wrote in your journal?? do you even have a journal??

i have been working on catching up on my journal, which is pretty much the only thing that i ever do when i write in my journal!! but the good news is that i am only 7 months behind! not bad considering! i've always been a big journal writer, it really helps me process my thoughts and decipher my feelings and it's an incredible emotional outlet! my posterity will probably be reeling with how ridiculous i sound...but it is what it is! it's my life and it's going to be written down in all of it's (probably embellished) glory!

Talk about a curveball!!

Well! Life has thrown me a massive curveball! All i can say is, the Lord does work in mysterious ways! This week has been so crazy- on Sunday, i was set apart as the second counselor in the Relief Society presidency of my singles ward, which will be amazing and for which i am so grateful for! I was writing a post the other day about how grateful i am for this calling, which i am, but also about how i now feel like my life is starting to take shape and how things are starting to fall into place...well i won't be posting that post, because things have come crashing down! I am still grateful for my calling and i am excited for the opportunity to worry about and serve others instead of worrying about myself, but I now also know that the Lord is absolutely in control and that He's got a plan for me that i'm not quite aware of yet!

As of Tuesday of this week, I am unemployed again! I went into work and we all came to the understanding that I am not a good fit for their company and i agreed that this company is not a good fit for me! so under mutual agreement, i hightailed it out of there, never to return to the crap shoot that was my first post graduation job...and from hereafter, never to be referred to again! Done. It. Never. Happened.

Also this week, I was let go from a friendship! My dear friend that i have become so fond of and have come to rely on throughout these difficult months in my life, informed me over facebook :

Jesika,
I've been pondering a significant amount these past several weeks and I regret to inform you that I don't think you're a good fit for our friendship. You've tried your best but I don't think you quite make the cut.
My condolences,
Samantha

;)

As if nothing else were working in my life and i failed at a friendship! and i thought things were going so well! so the morale of the story- i am failing at life! I can't keep a job, or a friend, and now i don't know what to do! I don't really have any marketable skills, i don't even know what i want to do and nothing is working out the way that i thought it would!

BUT... as i was sitting there, listening to some poor business managers, tell me that i was not fit for their poorly run company, i knew at that moment that this was absolutely part of the plan that Heavenly Father is putting into motion for me! this is not going to be an easy time in my life, this i know! i'm going to have to dig deep and figure out who i am and what i want out of life and what the Lord wants me to do! At least i know that this is all going to work out, it's not working out at all how i would like, but the Lord is going to fit all of the discombobulated pieces together, and i hope i don't do anything stupid to mess it up!

Here's what i do know:

This was NOT the job for me, and Heavenly Father offered a way out so that i can find that better job He has for me somewhere else!

The Lord is absolutely in charge, and he might take me a on a wild goose chase and throw me some fast balls and some less than ideal curveballs, just to make sure that i'm still going to follow Him on this chase full of sports metaphors that i don't understand!

This calling has shown me that i am right where the Lord wants me. i never wanted to graduate from college and go back home to live with my parents in a town that has almost no potential for me, but i'm here, and even though it's not where i saw myself, it's where the Lord wants me and that is enough for now!

I've got a family, a roof over my head, and food on the table, so for now, I'm okay! i might not have a job, money, solid plans for my future, a boyfriend, or tons of friends to hang out with, but they'll come...whenever the Lord wants to send them to me!

and in the meantime, i'll be practicing my batting swing!

Blast from the Past!

i've been doing a lot of soul searching lately because i'm kind of lost right now in my life! i've just completed a major milestone in my life and i'm trying to figure out what this next stage will bring! in my search, i've been doing a lot of looking at my past and trying to compare who i was then to who i am now and who i want to be in the future! this has lead me to find some really amazing gems of my past! this video is one such example! during my sophomore year at BYU-Idaho, i had the BEST roommates a girl could ask for! we were all so close and they are still my best friends to this day! Shanny, Kay, Becca and Megs- i love you!! i love this video because it reminds me of all of the good times that we had, but really, how much fun we did have! Everyday was a party and i loved every minute! Today i have been missing those times, thanks to many memory texts from Becca today :) and some other conversations i've had this past week, i'm remembering the good times and hoping for more!!

this video is just a brief glimpse of the fond memories i have in 308!

some of my favorite things from this video are:

Shan'tel's sweatpants that say, "You can't afford me" which she took a permanent marker to so that they read "You can afford me"!

Our winter lights in the background!

Shan'tel belting out "EGGGGSSSS"!

OUR HICK ACCENTS!

Kayla's laugh in the background!

Megs riding in on her horse! and her karate cartwheel!

and let's be honest- Becca's excellence as a director!

Above is Part 1 and below is Part 2 of this skit!

oh...how i love these friends! my life is forever better because I know you!

there are so many more videos i wish to post but i might crash my computer trying to put them all on! we had too many good times and i'm so glad that we documented so many!

i love you Megan, Kayla, Shan'tel and Becca!

this one's for you!

p.s. this last video is just a bonus! because i remember how much fun we had this night! and i'm missing our brothers like nobody's business! There is little i can say to make this video make sense- i have only three things to say, 1) John, 2) the Pope, 3) the KKK! :) Listen to those laughs!

To...

My Dear Friend Heather Hughes!

(pictured in the middle)

Today i found out that your father died, and today i have been thinking of you! You have known that this is coming for a while now- your dad had cancer and it came back again. But you were selfless and wanted him to go quickly so that he wouldn't suffer anymore!

How lucky we are that we have the Gospel and know that he is not gone, how lucky you are to have the Spirit and the peace that it has brought you in these last couple of months

and will continue to bring you!

How loved you are, by me and so many others-

your family, your friends and your Father in Heaven.

How blessed I am to know you! You are such a strong woman, and i admire you! i have always admired your close relationship with your Heavenly Father. When you pray, I know that He hears you because you know that He hears you! How blessed I was to be your roommate and to be your forever friend! From talking muffins and prodigal bamboo, to late night talks in my room, to sobbing fests in your room, to trips and adventures, to moving and moving on! You have been the truest friend to me these 4 years, and even though our paths have gone different directions, we are still friends!

You are going through a hard time right now, but you will get through with flying colors! because you have already showed me the strength that you have, because you know that

" death isn't as horrible as I thought it would be. It's really quite easy with the spirit."

You are so amazing! Only a strong, independent, humble person like you could feel that way! You help me realize that life is hard, but so good! I have my father with me, and my mom and my four brothers! I have a loving family and a nice house to live in. I have food and water and a job to go to. I am happy and healthy! and i have the Gospel of Jesus Christ in my life! and you have showed me that life is worth every minute that we have! I'm so glad that i have you in my life and i wish i could be there with you now!

but know that i love you dearly and am praying for you!

2010...

is off to a less than ideal start! here i am, a college graduate...living at home, unemployed and all of my future plans have come unraveled! so what is one to do?? a wise friend told me "write down things you are grateful for everyday and that will give you hope"! (or something like that) and Sam, you could not be more right! so at the end of my drab week and the beginning of a new, here is my list of wonderful things in my wonderful life!

BLANKETS!

my parents keep our home at a colder temperature than i did as a college student who didn't have to pay utilities! so because of that, we have blankets all over the house! we are always curled up in blankets, if we were not fashion conscious we would all own snuggies, but i think i can speak for all of us when i say, i would not be caught dead in a snuggie!

MY NEW LAPTOP!

this was the best graduation present! i am so glad that i don't have to use my grandpa laptop anymore! wireless internet is the best thing ever! at least with nothing else working in my life, i can always count on my laptop to come through for me! now if only i had some money to get her a new laptop skin...

A HOME TO LIVE IN!

quite honestly, i am glad that i am not homeless right now! my parents are kind enough to let me live at home until i figure out what i'm doing, which considering how much neither of us want it, is a huge thing to be grateful for! even when we were talking about me going back to school locally, they said that i could live here! never thought i would hear those words! that is how i know my parents love me...the fact that they haven't kicked me out yet!

MY BOYS!

as perhaps lame as it might sound, i am so glad that i have my little brothers! these guys are the only guys that i want to hang out with! this weekend, my parents went away for a night and i hung out with them! we had pizza and watched movies and did whatever we wanted and it was wonderful! Yes, i like hanging out with my 11, 14 and 17 year old brothers!

MY FRIENDS!

i have like zero friends in Nampa, but i do have some other places out there in the world! there are too many to name but all of you have been more than encouraging to me over the past couple of months! those of you who know me well know that i love school and the thought of finishing college was unnerving! but with all of your help, i feel that i can do this, i can make this transition and i can succeed! you all have such hope in me and it makes me almost believe it about myself! so thank you!

BABYSITTING!

Betsy, this may come as a shock, but i love babysitting your kids! ;) the other day I was holding Max and he got sleepy and fell asleep in my arms for a few minutes! it was at that moment that i realized that i REALLY want a baby and a family, and although i might not have it right now, when i always thought and hoped that i would, i will someday! and when that day comes, i will have beautiful babies like the one asleep in my arms and that's what i'm preparing for! and Heavenly Father must know that i need more preparation! but He also sends me a little girl to sit on my lap during church to tide me over in the meantime!

FAITH!

i don't know all the answers, heck, i don't know any answers! in the past week, i have found what i thought was a great job, turned down the job, questioned my whole career path, changed my whole career choice, gave up on a career, bawled my eyes out, hit half way to rock bottom and wanted to give up. and then i rerealized that if i have faith, everything will work out! i have no idea how, but i know the Lord does and that will have to be enough for now!

i'm sure that there will be many more times i need to make a list like this because i am nowhere close to being out of the woods for this trial... but i haven't hit rock bottom until i have to put that i'm grateful for guys that wear socks with their sandals on my thankful list! when that happens, know that i'm officially insane! until then, i'm thankful!

Graduation!

Well, i did it! On Friday and Saturday, I graduated from Brigham Young University-Idaho! with a Bachelor's degree in psychology! It's such a surreal feeling, 4 and 1/2 years of college over and done! These college years have gone so fast, i can hardly believe it!

Friday, December 18, 2009 was a crazy day! i had to take the last two finals of my college career, run around campus to get graduation tickets and all before that night when i had my convocation with the Education and Human Development college- they read my name and i walked across the stage to get my diploma (cover)! and of course got to wear this most stylish outfit!

All of my family was able to come for my graduation! i was so happy to have them there with me on this big day! My parents, my brothers, both sets of grandparents and my dear aunt and uncle from Rexburg all came to support me and i was so glad!

Saturday, December 19, 2009 was the Commencement ceremony for all of the Fall 2009 graduates- there were 1270+ graduates! We lined up in the Fieldhouse and as we walked through the halls to the auditorium, our teachers lined the halls and clapped for us as we walked down the hall! It was such a cool experience because these teachers know my name and know me and really did care about me and my accomplishment! It was a really cool experience and I was so glad that i was able to go to this school and have this experience!

Graduation was a really great experience- there were excellent speakers and wonderful words of wisdom and a real feeling of accomplishment! It was a wonderful end to my hard working 4 and 1/2 years of college! President Clarke spake, Elder Johnson of the Seventy and Elder Richard G. Scott! (When his speech is posted on line, i will post my favorite parts!)

It was a wonderful weekend- i still don't feel old enough, wise enough or mature enough to be a college graduate but so it is! I'm sad that this stage has come to an end, it has been a wonderful time of my life, but i'm also excited for this next stage! There are so wonderful things to come...and i'll just have to wait and see what it is!